There's a moment on a wedding day when everything pauses. Your child is getting ready—alone in a room, hair and makeup done, wearing something beautiful and new. The ceremony hasn't started yet. The families are waiting. The photographer is circling. And for just a few minutes, everything stops. That's when they might open a drawer or check their phone or find something waiting on the bed. That's when they find your letter. That's when they feel your presence, even though the day belongs to everyone else.
What is a wedding day letter?
It's not a toast that gets delivered to a room full of people. It's not a card signed in a rush the night before. It's a letter written now, years in advance, that captures exactly what you want to say to your child at one of the most significant moments of their life. It's a private conversation between you and them, in the quiet before the chaos, at the moment they need it most.
Many parents write these letters years in advance—when their child is still young, maybe in high school, maybe even earlier. They write them because they know they might get emotional on the day itself. Because the words matter too much to leave to chance. Because they want their child to have something tangible, something they can hold and read again on their honeymoon or on the anniversary of their wedding or in the middle of a rough patch when they need to remember why they made this commitment.
What should you say?
This is where it gets personal. Every parent has different things they want their child to know. Some write about the moment they first held them—how small they were, how much they were loved before they even existed. Some write about memories from their childhood that shaped who they are. Some write about lessons learned from their own relationships, their own mistakes, their own joys. Some write prayers or blessings. Some write about the person their child is marrying, and what they see in them.
What matters is that it comes from you. Not from what you think a wedding day letter is supposed to be. From what you actually feel about your child, about love, about marriage, about the life they're stepping into.
My darling, I'm writing this on the day you turned twenty-one, knowing I won't give it to you until your wedding day—years from now. I don't know who you'll marry yet, or where you'll live, or what your life will look like. But I know this: I'm so proud of the person you've become. You're kind. You're brave. You're stronger than you think you are. When you marry, you're not leaving this family. You're expanding it. You're choosing to build something new with someone who loves you. And that's one of the most courageous things you'll ever do. I can't be there in every moment of your marriage. But I'm there in you. In the way you love. In the things I taught you about commitment and forgiveness and showing up for people. Be patient with each other. Choose kindness when you're angry. Laugh together. Build something beautiful. I love you so much. And I'm so proud of you. Mom.
The memories that matter
A wedding day letter is also an opportunity to reflect on who your child has been becoming. You've watched them grow from someone who needed you for everything to someone who's choosing to build a life with another person. You've seen them fail and get back up. You've seen them learn what they want and go after it. You've seen them become themselves.
The letter is where you can honor that journey. You can tell them about moments they might not even remember—a time they showed courage, or kindness, or strength. You can remind them that they come from a long line of people who loved them. You can acknowledge that this marriage is a new chapter, but it's not a rejection of the family they came from. You're releasing them into their own life, and you're doing it with pride and blessing.
The practical magic of it
There's something about finding a handwritten or carefully printed letter on your wedding day that hits differently than a phone call or a hug. It's something they can hold. Something they can read slowly, taking in the words. Something they can reread on hard days. Something they can share with their spouse—"This is what my parent said to me." Something they can keep in a drawer or a box for the rest of their life.
And the beauty of writing it now, years in advance, is that you're not rushed. You're not overwhelmed by emotion on the day itself. You have time to find the words that actually matter. You have permission to be vulnerable, to be real, to say the things you might not get to say in the moment.
From parent to adult
A wedding day letter marks a real transition. You're no longer their parent in the way you were when they were young. You're becoming someone different now—an advisor, a cheerleader, a witness to their life. The letter is where you acknowledge that. Where you celebrate who they've become. Where you give them your blessing to build something new while also letting them know you'll always be there if they need you.
Writing the letter is healing for you, too. It forces you to sit with the reality that your child is grown. That they're capable. That they don't need you the way they did before. That your role is changing. And instead of just grieving that, the letter lets you celebrate it. To say: "I see you. You're ready for this. I believe in you. Go build something beautiful."
Your child's wedding day will be one of the most important days of their life. And what they'll remember forever isn't just the flowers or the vows or the photos. They'll remember how they felt. They'll remember who believed in them. They'll remember the words that mattered, said at exactly the right moment by someone who knows them completely.
Write that letter. Write it now, while you have time to find the words that feel true. Choose the date when you want it delivered—the morning of the wedding, the day before, whenever feels right for your child. We'll keep it safe, and we'll make sure it arrives exactly when you want them to read it. Because this letter isn't just for the wedding day. It's a gift for their whole life. Write your letter with Dear Forward today—capture who you are right now, capture who they are, capture the love that's going to carry them through everything ahead.